You are not the only victim or casualty to the game. You're not dead. Take it as the victory that it is.

[ regardless of what love is absent in him for rhaenyra and jacaerys, their deaths should have been by his hand. and that baela was killed — he would have spared her, out of respect for her skills and her grandmother's memory.

but he nonetheless places a soothing hand to the back of tim's neck, soothing the tenseness out with small, firm touches. ]

You do not have sole claim to rage, in this. Sleep for a few hours at least.