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[holyposition]

WELCOME TO THE SALTBURNT NETWORK

USERNAME:
t.laughlin

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[holyposition]

it was weird.

He was excited about it.

[kobes]

huh.
that's weird. why?

[holyposition]

idk, he just hates Harry that much?

he went on this whole spiel about wanting me to be happy and make my own choices like he got body snatched but instead of an alien they just replaced him with a normal dad a decade after it would have been helpful

or maybe he thinks hawk is hot too.

[kobes]

oh yeah that might track
why's he hate him? cause he looks like a puppy dog nobody wants?

huh. weird. is he on crack maybe
your uncle's weird too ngl

well, he's got eyes.

[holyposition]

Oh he got in Harry's business all, "I know youre fucking my son" and he denied it so he thinks he's a coward for not "claiming" me
which I never asked him to do

maybe he is! they're all nuts.

if I can trust him for anything, its that he doesn't want to fuck anyone I'm fucking.

[kobes]

you can't win with that guy
if harry'd admitted it, he would've been in bigger trouble lmfao

yeah he offered me a job
ur uncle i mean
i said no, don't worry

are you sure
are you positive

[holyposition]

Probably! They're snobs, too. He's an emergency doctor instead of a tech billionaire, how could he be good enough?

Good.

I'm pretty sure.

[kobes]

doctor isnt good enough anymore?
missed that memo ig

"good"?

maybe he just approves of hawk or something
kind of a boner killer
can you survive parental approval, t?

[holyposition]

Apparently! I don't get it either.

He's crazy, too.

It kind of is but for dick that good I can overlook it

[kobes]

maybe it's the age thing? idk hawk's older too right

oh. yeah, had to have been to want me to work there
stupid.

that's my boy 💖💖💖 gotta overlook the fact that your dad approves or the terrorists win.

[holyposition]

he said Harry was too old but Hawk's even older

why would he want to recruit my friends? he knows I dont care about any of the vineyard stuff

sometimes the terrorists are right, baby k.

[kobes]

maybe he just hates guys with beards??
who knows.

i dunno. maybe he felt sorry for me or something
whatever, doesn't matter.

not the metaphorical ones that don't want you to get laid, baby t.

[holyposition]

lol
I mentioned it looked good on him at some photoshoot so he said he'd grow it back for me
guess we'll find out

he can't offer what isn't his, anyway. they're trying to get majority ownership, but it won't work

[kobes]

look at you, you're an evil lil genius
conducting experiments and shit

every time you say business words it gives me a headache 😠
like listening to talk radio

[holyposition]

It's called having a thirst for knowledge.

I'd rather listen to talk radio than the booze business. At least that makes me angry, instead of bored.

[kobes]

it's called being a nerd 🤓

talk radio gets you fired up? every time i think i've heard everything about you...

does hawk know about
y'know. your extracurriculars.

[holyposition]

Yeah, the news makes me angry. Duh.

A little bit. I gave him some shit about his tax deductible activism.

I mean he's done a lot for visibility. That's more than most people ever do. But he's in a position to do more.

[kobes]

well. yeah. the world sucks.

wait, shit, did you really?
and he didn't kick you out or patronize you?

[holyposition]

He said he'd join me on the next one.

[kobes]

maybe you dickmatized HIM
or, uh
assmatized

[holyposition]

I sure hope so. I need him coming back 🥵

[kobes]

and coming on YOUR back 😏😏😏

[holyposition]

and on my face, and my chest, and in my ass and in my mouth 💦💦💦