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[holyposition]

WELCOME TO THE SALTBURNT NETWORK

USERNAME:
t.laughlin

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Comments

[kobes]

are you in the "enable my delusion" stage or the "snap me out of it" stage?

[holyposition]

There's no delusion. it's not like im wedding planning.

I just need help being chill about it, I think. hes perfect but like, suspiciously so. There's got to be a catch.

[kobes]

does HE know that?

yeah that's your logic kicking in, babe. there's always always always a catch.

[holyposition]

Hes got to. That was our first date. First...everything else. Unless he's a stalker.

It's probably another mid life crisis. He's not over his partner and has to drown his sorrows in early 20s ass. That's usually how these things go. They're just not usually....THAT good.

[kobes]

some guys still believe in love and shit, baby t.
be careful.

yeah, well, maybe you got a talented one
that's good!! good sex is good at the weird family vacation!
you haven't been dickmatized or whatever.

[holyposition]

That's impossible, he was with his partner for soooo long and then he died. If I were him I wouldn't believe in anything again

I'm not dickmatized.

maybe footmatized. his are really sexy

[kobes]

oh yeah, point in the big-dick serial killer column i guess
but also he was monogamous in the 90s. something is UP.

ew. did you suck those too?

[holyposition]

he was in the public eye. being wholesome for the cameras. but he is a dirty, dirty, man

🤤🤤🤤

[kobes]

bitch if you don't tell me every single detail right now i'll never speak to you again

[holyposition]

Okay so
i kind of thought he wouldn't be up to it because he's too nice
but when it's time he flicks the switch and goes daddy dom mode

He made me fold all our clothes in a nice little pile before he'd touch me. Which was hot, the anticipation.
dick is perfect. big, tastes amazing, little bit of curve that feels sooo good pounding my fucking brains out

he eats ass like hes on survivor and hes been starving for a month. I think i could have come just from that if he'd have let me but noooo he had to pick just the right time to stop and start fucking me into the mattress
he held my arms down so all I could do was take it like a good boy 😇

then he flipped me around cuz he wanted to see my face when i came. I dont usually like that but he is so hot i changed my mind
gave me a cute little creampie, licked it clean, and then spat it back into my mouth

and then round 2 🥵

[kobes]

i changed my mind
you SHOULD marry him

[holyposition]

STOPPPPPPP YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE MY VOICE OF REASON 😡😡😡

[kobes]

my reason has been vicariously fucked out by the fact that this was round ONE. one of FOUR.
now reason demands you lock that dick DOWN

[holyposition]

four yesterday. this morning he made me breakfast and then bent me over the kitchen counter. 😇

[kobes]

you gotta figure out how to soulbond him to u somehow
otherwise you'll be ruined for all other dick and have to become a monk

[holyposition]

I'm not ruined for other dick
I don't think?

I just got back a few hours ago and then I had to talk to my dad so I haven't tried

[kobes]

oh yeah? do you wanna fuck anyone else right now?

well, that'll kill your boner, won't it.

[holyposition]

No but I'm sore

....but if he wanted me right this second I could probably muster the courage

he kept the espresso martinis coming until I told him about Hawk
in a lot less detail
but still.

[kobes]

"probably" u little liar 🙄

oh???? how'd that go over 👀👀👀

[holyposition]

it was weird.

He was excited about it.

[kobes]

huh.
that's weird. why?

[holyposition]

idk, he just hates Harry that much?

he went on this whole spiel about wanting me to be happy and make my own choices like he got body snatched but instead of an alien they just replaced him with a normal dad a decade after it would have been helpful

or maybe he thinks hawk is hot too.

[kobes]

oh yeah that might track
why's he hate him? cause he looks like a puppy dog nobody wants?

huh. weird. is he on crack maybe
your uncle's weird too ngl

well, he's got eyes.

[holyposition]

Oh he got in Harry's business all, "I know youre fucking my son" and he denied it so he thinks he's a coward for not "claiming" me
which I never asked him to do

maybe he is! they're all nuts.

if I can trust him for anything, its that he doesn't want to fuck anyone I'm fucking.

[kobes]

you can't win with that guy
if harry'd admitted it, he would've been in bigger trouble lmfao

yeah he offered me a job
ur uncle i mean
i said no, don't worry

are you sure
are you positive