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[holyposition]

WELCOME TO THE SALTBURNT NETWORK

USERNAME:
t.laughlin

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[hymen]

you're the only one worried about saving his soul.

[ ... ]

perception doesn't suit you.

i owe you. a lot.

[holyposition]

Don't worry, I won't tell anyone you're a decent guy deep down. Our secret.

Come say hello, then. It doesn't have to be here. It just can't be a bar. Lent.

[hymen]

i'm really not, tim.

wait, seriously? you're doing that? you're giving up drinking for forty days?

[holyposition]

I know you like to say that.

Drinking and sex. I'd expect a call from Hawk before the weekend.

[hymen]

no one knows me better than me.

the last month didn't count as deprivation?

[holyposition]

I don't think that's true of anyone. Is it really so bad, someone seeing something good in you?

No. It wasn't my choice, it has to be a meaningful sacrifice. And I wasn't abstaining, exactly.

[hymen]

you'd just be giving yourself a reason to be disappointed later, which means i have to hear about it, so yes, it's really so bad.

seriously? you were having sex while revenants had their dinner next door?

[holyposition]

You're not fated to ruin everything, Embry. You have free will.

Well, not often. And only in places that were safe. But I did, yes.

[hymen]

if it's not fate, doesn't it make it worse if i'm choosing it?

i'm honestly impressed. we're starting to have too much in common.

[holyposition]

Have you ever tried just...not choosing it?

The adrenaline got to me. But it's not the craziest thing I've done. You think I'm a prude just because I go to church?

[hymen]

[ bitch,, ]

what did i do to make ash choose to leave me?

no. the people that go to church are the biggest freaks i've ever met.

[holyposition]

He was trying to protect you. In those circumstances, any good man would have done the same.

From you, it sounds like a compliment.

[hymen]

i disagree with his shitty choices. i was already protecting him.

well, being a freak in bed isn't exactly derogatory in my book.

[holyposition]

I know you were doing the best you could, but they already bit his fingers off.

Are you hitting on me?

[hymen]

no one ever died from missing some fingers. they weren't even the fingers people use for sex.

yes. i am hitting on you while we talk about my dead asshole lover.

[holyposition]

They died from the bites, you know that.

Sorry. We can talk about something else. Let me make it up to you.

[hymen]

i would have found a way to keep him safe.

you don't have anything to make up to me. i already told you, i'm the one that owes you.

[holyposition]

If anything like this happens again, you should call me. I would have been happy to set them all on fire for you.

What are you doing right now?

[hymen]

you mean someone dying or me fucking up?

thinking about all the things i'm allowed to do that you can't.

[holyposition]

Zombies or monsters or...whatever's next. I'd like to be able to help out before anyone actually dies, next time.

There's more to life than sex and drinking. Do you have other hobbies?

[hymen]

i can't plan for the next crisis yet. give me another week.

of course i do. snorting blow. and i do the new york times crossword every day. or i did before coming here.

[holyposition]

Call me. It's an easy plan. Only one step.

Any sports? Artistic interests? Books or movies? How do you stay in shape if you're drunk or high all the time?

[hymen]

yeah, okay. fine.

i rowed crew at yale. you know i like to read. i stay in shape by fucking a lot. i also do calisthenics. why does this sound like you're trying to stage an intervention?

[holyposition]

I didn't know that. I played baseball at Fordham.

I'm not. I just want to get to know you better. 🙂

[hymen]

was it because you like to hit balls or for the tight pants?

believe it or not, you already know everything you need to know about me.