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[holyposition]

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t.laughlin

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[mygoodsir]

Tim, nothing of what we do is spoken of in polite company.

I don't find it unusual. I adore every last inch of you. And I enjoy all of the things you've suggested we do.

Tim? May I ask you an extremely silly question?

[holyposition]

Well, that’s not true! We do all kinds of things, not just hot and dirty ones. Walks, lunches, movie dates. Things I could tell my mother about. If I ever make it home. And...if I'm brave enough to tell her that I'm seeing men.

Of course you can.

[mygoodsir]

My mother would adore you if we were not considered inverse perverts.

I like our dates very much. Oh, I have discovered so much more music since the last time we sat down to listen. I will have to show you!

Thank you. This is very awkward to ask, but... were you aware I find women attractive?

[holyposition]

Oh, you'd be out of luck either way. I'm not to waste time with lazy protestants or heathen non-believers.

Good! I still have some favorites I haven't shown you yet.

It hasn't really come up. But the way you talk about your Lady Silence...I kind of figured. It doesn't bother me, if that worries you.

[mygoodsir]

I could convert?

Oh, splendid!

I was worried, yes. It came up with someone else and it occurred to me we'd never discussed it.

But Silence? Oh dear Lord, no. We never ever engaged in anything of the sort.

[holyposition]

Only if you truly wanted to. But being a man would still be a problem for them.

I know you didn't do anything. You told me it had been a long time when we were first intimate.

Is there a woman you're interested in? What brought this on?

[mygoodsir]

Alas, that part I cannot change.

Yes. My apologies. The thought is just rather upsetting.

Oh, no. But I think I surprised this other person, and as you are so very dear to me I did not wish you to ever think I was hiding anything from you.

[holyposition]

And I, of course, wouldn't want you to.

Sorry. I didn't mean to imply anything salacious.

Thank you for sharing with me, then. Who?

[mygoodsir]

True.

It is perfectly alright. I think I may be overly sensitive on the topic.

Theo.

[holyposition]

You know, I think you're in the majority around here, liking both.

It's clear that you care about her a lot, even if it's not like that. I wish I could meet her.

Oh.

[mygoodsir]

I believe you may be correct.

Oh, I so wish you could. I feel that you are patient enough that you would learn to understand her.

Tim? When you reply with "oh" I have noticed it usually means that you are bothered.

[holyposition]

[ Called out on brat behavior... ]

I'm not bothered. I'm...wary.

[mygoodsir]

Of what, my darling? Have I done something wrong?

[holyposition]

No, you haven't.

He seems nice. It's my own problem.

[mygoodsir]

He is. He is also much more intelligent than he comes off.


Do you wish me to cease seeing anyone but you?

[holyposition]

No, I don't. That wouldn't be fair.



Okay, this is gonna sound really stupid.

But he won that stupid vote. [ Biggest slut. ] And I'm not judging him for it. But what if he's better than me? At...whatever it is you're doing.

[mygoodsir]

No, it would not be fair. But I would do it all the same, if you asked.

Tim, I think you may be judging just a little.

Oh my dearest darling. No.

I will not tease you for such thoughts, as I would be a liar if I said that I have not had similar fears. Your other lovers are objectively much more virile, much more handsome. Hawk is a veritable Adonis with decades of erotic experience.

But that matters not. I've no idea how I captured your affections but against all odds I have. That is what is important.

I trust that you are not secretly comparing us to one another. Am I correct in this?

[holyposition]

I don't want you to do anything I ask, even if it's not fair to you. You deserve better.

I'm not comparing you.

[ Mostly. He's not keeping score, but there's differences, of course there are. If he were just like Hawk, or vise versa, he wouldn't need them both. ]

I'm just being insecure. That's not your fault. I need to work on that.

A veritable Adonis, though.

Are you attracted to him?

[mygoodsir]

I don't know that I do.

Then you see my point. You are not the same men, and you've no reason to be jealous. In fact, I feel that if you were to talk about anything but intercourse you'd get along quite well.

It is alright, Tim. I am not upset with you.

He is undeniably an attractive man.

[holyposition]

Do what I say when I tell you to trust me on that, then.

Maybe. This is still so new, though. I don't know what to expect when I think about other people. Since I don't know you inside and out yet.

Sure. But I wasn't asking objectively.

[mygoodsir]

As you wish.

Don't you? I would tell you anything you want to know.

[So much for that dodge.]

Yes, but in a different way.

[holyposition]

I know. And I would for you. But it couldn't occur to me to ask everything there is to know in...what's it been, a couple months? And I was dead or not myself for a good chunk of it. Discovering each other is part of the fun.

What way is that?

[mygoodsir]

No, you are correct. And I do apologise. I recognise that my feelings for you are intense, and probably happened inappropriately fast.

He reminds me of certain officers I have known. Very masculine men who have no desire for the more affectionate side of love.

[holyposition]

You don't have to apologize. It's always been fast for me, too.

Well...that's not true. I'm sure it seems like it. But he is affectionate. I'm not neglected.

[mygoodsir]

I've never been in love like this before.

Oh, no, of course not! I know perfectly well that it isn't the case.
But you asked how I found him attractive.