Because someone I love was being hurtful on purpose, that's why.
You're wrong. I have changed. I know now that I don't have to take that from you. Other people appreciate that I have convictions. And wouldn't broadcast every doubt they have about the future in front of everyone.
You really think my goal was to hurt you in all of this?
There's nothing wrong with having convictions, Tim. But sometimes the wrong ones get people killed, or make them do stupid things. That's got nothing to do with you or me or god or anyone else - that's human nature.
You're passionate - you dive in with your whole heart. That's something I've known since we met, and something that consumed me too. But christ if it isn't an extreme sometimes in the worst ways.
I stand by what I said. You could have locked that at any time if you were worried about what everyone was going to think about it. I didn't do that to dress you down - I did it to try and talk some sense into you.
I don't agree with that. I don't think it's stupid to fight for what you believe in, even if it's hard or dangerous. Someone has to, Hawk. Nothing changes if nobody fights. I told you that's what I wanted to do, and you said you'd support me.
I was wondering if you'd consider how I felt long enough to lock it yourself.
Well, it wasn't. But if it had to be - I'd rather you get hurt by a few well-intended words than wind up on the chopping block. Armand is dangerous, obviously. The people hunting him are too, they're just better at hiding it and dressing it up like they're doing everyone a favor. I didn't want to see you caught in the middle.
Skippy, you've gotta stop taking everything personally. I didn't say it was stupid to fight for what you believe in. But you've got to be strategic about it. You can't - shouldn't - just charge in the second you think you've got a fragment to go off of. That video wasn't the full picture. I'm not defending Armand, but that didn't seem intentional.
Alright, it wasn't my finest moment. But it wasn't yours either.
It doesn't matter if it was intentional! I never said kill him. I never said lock him up and throw away the key. I said he needs to be restrained before he hurts anyone else. The way I should have been when I came back all messed up.
I haven't done anything wrong except waste time arguing with you.
You can’t know that one way or the other. Especially if he’s under some kind of influence.
Fine, say I put a loaded gun in Danny’s hands and he blows someone’s brains out. Are my hands clean? I’m the reason McCarthy got backed into a corner, you know. I did plenty of things to keep Senator Smith’s hands clean. You send a pack of hyenas after a vampire, someone’s going to get hurt.
Yeah, it is a waste of time. But you drag it there anyway. Do you even trust me anymore?
Neither can you. I can’t do nothing out of fear of a slight chance of retaliation.
That’s not the same, and you know it. Danny gets off on it. Those people are trained to deal with problems just like this one, and they know that killing him only makes it worse when he gets back. Have a little faith in them not being slobbering idiots. And someone will get hurt if he’s left to keep doing that, too. We need to prioritize the victims over Armand.
I drag it there? The first thing you did was tell me to leave it, like you're my father or my master. You're the one who doesn't trust me. If you don’t trust me, and you don't want the same future I do, then what are we doing?
Not every problem needs you jumping to the forefront to solve it. I don't mean that to hurt you, or to doubt your capabilities - but people drop dead and kill and go off the deep end here every damn day. I'm worried one day you're going to stick your neck out on the wrong one and...you won't come back. Do you get how much that scares me, Tim?
Yeah, they're trained in killing these kinds of problems.
We both know I'm not either of those things. I do trust you, Skippy - why do you think I looked high and low to find you after you died, even knowing the things I heard? And why do you think I gave all of myself to you? I didn't do any of that lightly.
The future I want is one where the slightest provocation doesn't send you spiraling back to all the mistakes I've made and throwing them in my face. If we can't move past them, then what are we doing? Maybe I unintentionally started it, but you've got no problem escalating.
And I'm supposed to, what? Ask your approval before I get involved in anything? I understand that you're scared. But if I can do anything, or offer any information, that might keep someone from going through what I'm going through, I have to choose that over your fear.
You're not learning from them, Hawk. That's why I brought it up, because you wanted me to shut up like last time. Will you have learned from them by the time we get home? Or will it be like it was before? If you don't want to be with a "crusader", tell me now, because that's how things are going to be.
No. But you could try thinking critically before bulldozing into it and being first on the scene.
I have learned, Tim. You just don't want to accept that sometimes I'm right, or that my approach is more measured and subtle than yours. I would have gladly jumped in with the best resources to get Armand the help he needed to stop chomping on the Balfours' girl du jour. Like Louis or Lestat - the people who know him and aren't likely to put a fucking stake through his head. If applying logic to it doesn't jive with your idea of immediacy, then that's not crusading - it's just foolish.
I'm not hiding anymore. I've got no intention of going back to the way things were.
Look...when we weren't ourselves, I saw his life laid out plain in the museum. I don't even have the words to explain it - other than centuries of suffering. He might have had it rougher than anyone else I know. And I'm not some bleeding heart, but he broke down when we were in the church - before we got the baptism and went back to normal.
I told him I wouldn't forget.
He's no saint, but he doesn't deserve to be struck down when he's not in his right mind.
I'm sorry to hear that. Really. I don't wish more suffering on him. But having a hard life doesn't mean you get to attack people. If he really doesn't mean it, he should be glad to be restrained until he's normal again.
You keep worrying like his death is for certain. I don't see any heads on stakes. You should have a little more faith in people.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2025-08-26 01:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-08-26 02:11 am (UTC)You're wrong. I have changed. I know now that I don't have to take that from you. Other people appreciate that I have convictions. And wouldn't broadcast every doubt they have about the future in front of everyone.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-26 03:14 am (UTC)There's nothing wrong with having convictions, Tim. But sometimes the wrong ones get people killed, or make them do stupid things. That's got nothing to do with you or me or god or anyone else - that's human nature.
You're passionate - you dive in with your whole heart. That's something I've known since we met, and something that consumed me too. But christ if it isn't an extreme sometimes in the worst ways.
I stand by what I said. You could have locked that at any time if you were worried about what everyone was going to think about it. I didn't do that to dress you down - I did it to try and talk some sense into you.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-26 03:24 am (UTC)I don't agree with that. I don't think it's stupid to fight for what you believe in, even if it's hard or dangerous. Someone has to, Hawk. Nothing changes if nobody fights. I told you that's what I wanted to do, and you said you'd support me.
I was wondering if you'd consider how I felt long enough to lock it yourself.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-26 03:50 am (UTC)Skippy, you've gotta stop taking everything personally. I didn't say it was stupid to fight for what you believe in. But you've got to be strategic about it. You can't - shouldn't - just charge in the second you think you've got a fragment to go off of. That video wasn't the full picture. I'm not defending Armand, but that didn't seem intentional.
Alright, it wasn't my finest moment. But it wasn't yours either.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-26 03:58 am (UTC)It doesn't matter if it was intentional! I never said kill him. I never said lock him up and throw away the key. I said he needs to be restrained before he hurts anyone else. The way I should have been when I came back all messed up.
I haven't done anything wrong except waste time arguing with you.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-26 03:00 pm (UTC)Fine, say I put a loaded gun in Danny’s hands and he blows someone’s brains out. Are my hands clean? I’m the reason McCarthy got backed into a corner, you know. I did plenty of things to keep Senator Smith’s hands clean. You send a pack of hyenas after a vampire, someone’s going to get hurt.
Yeah, it is a waste of time. But you drag it there anyway. Do you even trust me anymore?
no subject
Date: 2025-08-26 03:42 pm (UTC)That’s not the same, and you know it. Danny gets off on it. Those people are trained to deal with problems just like this one, and they know that killing him only makes it worse when he gets back. Have a little faith in them not being slobbering idiots. And someone will get hurt if he’s left to keep doing that, too. We need to prioritize the victims over Armand.
I drag it there? The first thing you did was tell me to leave it, like you're my father or my master. You're the one who doesn't trust me. If you don’t trust me, and you don't want the same future I do, then what are we doing?
no subject
Date: 2025-08-27 12:11 am (UTC)Yeah, they're trained in killing these kinds of problems.
We both know I'm not either of those things. I do trust you, Skippy - why do you think I looked high and low to find you after you died, even knowing the things I heard? And why do you think I gave all of myself to you? I didn't do any of that lightly.
The future I want is one where the slightest provocation doesn't send you spiraling back to all the mistakes I've made and throwing them in my face. If we can't move past them, then what are we doing? Maybe I unintentionally started it, but you've got no problem escalating.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-27 12:23 am (UTC)You're not learning from them, Hawk. That's why I brought it up, because you wanted me to shut up like last time. Will you have learned from them by the time we get home? Or will it be like it was before? If you don't want to be with a "crusader", tell me now, because that's how things are going to be.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-27 06:12 pm (UTC)I have learned, Tim. You just don't want to accept that sometimes I'm right, or that my approach is more measured and subtle than yours. I would have gladly jumped in with the best resources to get Armand the help he needed to stop chomping on the Balfours' girl du jour. Like Louis or Lestat - the people who know him and aren't likely to put a fucking stake through his head. If applying logic to it doesn't jive with your idea of immediacy, then that's not crusading - it's just foolish.
I'm not hiding anymore. I've got no intention of going back to the way things were.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-27 06:25 pm (UTC)1/2
Date: 2025-08-28 12:33 am (UTC)She's alive, isn't she?
no subject
Date: 2025-08-28 12:36 am (UTC)I told him I wouldn't forget.
He's no saint, but he doesn't deserve to be struck down when he's not in his right mind.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-28 01:01 am (UTC)You keep worrying like his death is for certain. I don't see any heads on stakes. You should have a little more faith in people.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-28 01:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-08-28 01:15 am (UTC)If I'm wrong, you can throw it in my face, but until then, I'm not arguing with you about something that hasn't happened.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-28 01:16 am (UTC)So are we done arguing?
no subject
Date: 2025-08-28 01:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-08-28 01:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-08-28 01:36 am (UTC)That's not happening, Hawk.
no subject
Date: 2025-08-28 01:39 am (UTC)The flirting, not the insulting.
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Date: 2025-08-28 01:42 am (UTC)1/2
Date: 2025-08-28 01:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2025-08-28 01:44 am (UTC)(no subject)
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